The Everyday Mystic

If you’re like I am, it is easy to get caught up in the busy-ness of the day.  Rushing from one meeting to the next, dealing with demanding customers and employee’s concerns, putting out the latest "fire" at the office or at home, returning phone calls and wading through a knee-deep pile of emails - the din of a hectic schedule drowns out the hush of the quiet center of your true being.  The good news is your quiet center is always available and it is just waiting for you to tap in, however briefly, to its calm.

Here’s a tip for finding the stillness in the midst of a busy day.  Sit or pause quietly and turn your attention to your heart.  Focus on your heart until you can hear and feel it beating. You may need to close your eyes to block out distractions and zoom into this awareness. It sounds so simple, but when you are caught up in the day’s pseudo-emergencies, it is not easy. Rest for a moment in the strength and the love of your heart.  Plug in to its power. Once you feel the power, imagine sending love from your heart out to all those around you.

Because the heart is the body’s energetic center of love, compassion and forgiveness, this practice connects you to those higher virtues.  This mini-moment of awareness will allow you to go back to your tasks with renewed energy.  It is moments like these that help us become Everyday Mystics.

You might want to post reminders to yourself to find the stillness in your heart.  You can post sticky dots (you can find them in office supply stores) on your computer monitor, your refrigerator, your mirror and your car’s dashboard as a reminder to listen to your heart.  I get tingles on my face during the day, reminding me to go within and listen to my heart. You might take a moment before opening your email, your postal mail or before eating to focus on your heart. 

The result?  You will be happier, calmer, more connected to Source.  You will be more productive.  Others will want to be around you.

These are good things.

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It may seem like an odd time to be discussing practicing gratitude. The economy is a mess. Thousands of employees have been or are facing the possibility of being laid-off, outsourced or cut-back. Because of the uncertainty, many families anticipate drastically reduced spending on holiday extras such as presents and vacation travel.

Now, more than ever, is the best time to practice gratitude.

Why should you be grateful when it seems like things are at their worst? According to recent research[1], the practice of gratitude and appreciation can make you happier – and who doesn’t want to be happier, especially now? There are several reasons that gratitude makes you cheerier. Gratitude directs your thoughts to the positive aspects of living, so instead of concentrating on the dismal reports you read everyday in the newspaper or hear on the news, you concentrate on good news. A daily practice of gratitude, such as keeping a gratitude journal or “counting your blessings”, helps you live more consciously because it forces you to pay attention to what happens in everyday life. Gratitude and appreciation helps you stay in the present moment, because to notice blessings you have to block out worries about the future and regrets from the past. And, although this is not scientifically proven, counting your blessings seems to increase the good things that happen to you, if only because you are more attentive to them.

Lastly, if you want to keep your job, finding a way to be happy is a good idea. In a Harvard Business Review article from June 2005, authors Tiziana Casciaro and Miguel Sousa Lobo found that managers tend to favor competent and likable people over more competent but less lovable workers. Happier people are generally more likable and more enjoyable to work with than the opposite. In deciding who to lay-off and who to keep, it may be the workers who keep a positive outlook that managers view more favorably.

Here are some ways to practice gratitude and appreciation in your life:

• Keep a gratitude journal. Noticing and writing about the blessings in your life is a great way to keep your antenna tuned to the positive. You might discipline yourself to notice something new to give thanks for everyday – not just the same old things like your family, your home and your job. In my journal, I draw a star next to each entry on my list of appreciations. The stars draw attention to the things I’m grateful for.
• Give thanks in prayer or meditation. Some people incorporate gratitude into a daily prayer or meditation practice. An elderly friend once told me, “You just get down on your knees every night – right there next to your bed - and give thanks for all your blessings.” I’ve always remembered her words.
• Notice and remember Kodak moments. Remember the commercial about capturing “Kodak moments” by photographing them? Kodak moments are those memories that make you smile; they are moments of great happiness or fleeting appreciation. You might notice moments from your family life, you might notice the color of a tree’s leaves, a hawk slowly circling in the sky or a beautiful sunset. Observe the feelings you experience in that moment. Live with your eyes and heart wide open, looking for beauty and grace everyday. Take time to savor your Kodak moments as you notice them, and then write about them later in your gratitude journal.
• Notice and remember synchronicities. Synchronicities are coincidences that are moments of grace. An example of a synchronicity is when you think about someone and then receive an email or phone call from that person. I experienced a synchronicity today – I just happened to be working on my computer early this morning (Sunday) when a reminder for an unusual morning meeting popped-up on my screen. I had totally forgotten about my commitment, and if I hadn’t been at my computer I would have missed the meeting. I wrote about it in my journal, giving thanks for being able to keep my commitment to the people I met with.
• Appreciate others. Make a habit of noticing what other people are doing, and provide them sincere appreciation when they do something well or noteworthy. If you are a manager, you might write a note to one of your employees about something they did that you appreciate. Mail it to their home address so they can share your message with their family. Another way to appreciate others is to simply say thank you and acknowledge the good job that person is doing. My husband plays in a professional orchestra and went for years without hearing any feedback from the conductor. When the maestro finally told him that he had done a good job, my husband was ecstatic that someone had finally noticed his dedication and good results. A little appreciation makes both you and the person you notice feel great!

This Thanksgiving, give thanks for all the blessings in your life, and vow to start practicing an attitude of gratitude everyday. You’ll be glad you did!

[1] “Authentic Happiness”, Dr. Martin E.P. Seligman, Ph.D. Dr. Seligman has conducted numerous studies on positive emotions and finds that gratitude is one practice that helps people increase happiness.

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A Course in Miracles states that there are only two emotions, love and fear. All other emotions are derivatives of those basic feelings. Of the two, which emotion have we primarily seen at work in our economy over the past several months? Of course, the answer is fear.

When I worked in the securities industry years ago, we said that markets are driven by fear and greed. Greed is the operative that fuels run-ups in the markets as investors try to make a buck (or a euro, in this global economy). Fear causes sell-offs like the stunning one we’ve seen in the markets over the past month.

Recently, I’ve heard people speak fearfully about their diminished investment accounts and 401k’s. I’ve heard people express fear about the security of their jobs. I even heard one friend express concern about the balance in her child’s school PTA bank account, which was approaching the $100,000 limit of the FDIC insurance.

Fear is a normal reaction to what’s happening to us. Fear has its good side – it can make us more vigilant and more careful about our money, which is not a bad thing. But fear can paralyze us and cloud our thinking. I can’t tell you how many people have told me they are about to cash out all their holdings. I admit to thinking about it now and again – wouldn’t cash be safe! This is a normal, fear-based reaction, but is not a wise or prudent action. Selling now would be counter to the market’s basic rule of buy low, sell high. Selling now is selling low.

So, how can we choose love at this time?

First, we need to remember several spiritual laws. The first is “As within, so without”, which means what you think about, comes about. The Bible expresses this as “So a man thinketh in his heart, so he is.” In other words, if you believe that this is a disaster, it will be so. The second is “Within chaos comes opportunity.” We know this to be true in our own spiritual development - a crisis such as a divorce, serious illness or death of a loved one causes short-term chaos but can initiate tremendous inner growth in the long term.

If you are fearful about being laid off at work or about business in general, here’s what you can do to replace fear with love:

• You valiantly choose a positive outlook as you walk in the door, refraining from gossiping or speculating at the water cooler (or via IM) about who’s going to get the ax and how bad it is at the office.
• You look for more ways to make your boss look good.
• You immediately revive your professional network both within and external to the company, taking time to go to lunch with others, catching up with people who you haven’t seen in months and listening for opportunities.
• You apply for jobs, perhaps even ones that are beneath your current abilities, but that could parlay into a better one in the future.
• You check your internal thoughts several times a day to make sure that you are clear within so that you send “good vibes” out to others, knowing that the energy will be returned to you.
• You look for the good in every situation, and express love in the form of appreciation, respect and integrity at work.

Choosing love also means to look for the opportunity in the downturn. Sandra Yancey, CEO of eWomenNetwork, says that recessions are great times to buy whatever you need, “because everything is on sale!” Warren Buffet said the same thing about stocks last week in an opinion piece in the New York Times entitled, “Buy American. I am.” Buffet related that in his personal investment account, he is buying up solid American stocks because he believes that they are cheap now and will appreciate in the long term. My colleague, Jean Keener, of Keener Financial Planning, has this sound advice: “Recessions have historically been fantastic buying opportunities. If you’ve got cash in hand that you won’t need for at least 5-10 years, this could be a rare opportunity to be brave and benefit financially in the long-term.”

In what other ways can you choose love by looking for the opportunity in the downturn? Think like a contrarian! Think about starting a business or going back to school. Look for side businesses that are recession-proof. At the grocery store last week, I stopped by a wine-tasting display where the woman behind the table proclaimed wine a recession-proof business. I guess we  need to drink more now than in good times! How can you find a recession-proof business like wine?

As for me, I’m doing some major contrarian thinking. I’m starting a new business, based on spiritual intelligence, in a recession! Crazy! So here is my vision: In this tough time, I picture myself planting seeds that need watering, weeding and fertilizing before I can harvest the fruits of my labor. Most of the seeds will bear fruit when the economy revives, but I leave room in that vision for some seeds to germinate and mature overnight like Jack’s beanstalk in the fairy tale.

Even if you know that keeping a positive frame of mind is good for you, it’s easy to fall into fear during these uncertain times. Click here for a quick visualization exercise that you can do to gain perspective and loosen fear’s grip.

For your own happiness, choose love. For the betterment of your career, choose love. Because life is short, choose love.

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Do you ever have a day when you look at your calendar and you want to either

a) cry (guys may not want to admit this, but it’s true for me) OR

b) run away to a remote desert island where they serve unlimited mai tais

because you have back-to-back meetings all day AND a pressing project to finish?  This is called stress - too much to do in too little time.  Times like this call us to our highest selves, because this is when the rubber hits the road on the spiritual journey.

It’s important to have a list of coping mechanisms in your back pocket, so to speak, in preparation for days like this.  Since I had one of those days yesterday, I have compiled this list of things to do the next time it happens.  I hope that by writing it down and sharing it with you, both of us can feel better about the next time we face this dilemma.

Here is a list of spiritually mature coping mechanisms for a stressful day:

1. Cancel or skip one meeting!  Surely there is something in your day that you can give up. Delegate, dismiss or defer the meeting that isn’t both urgent and important.  This alone can reduce your stress. Think of it as setting an example for others as a good way to put boundaries on your time.
2. Take a moment to go outside.  Walk slowly and mindfully, inhaling and exhaling with the rhythm of your step.  This can ground you immediately.
3. Ring a chime or bell if you can do so without disturbing others.  Take that moment to simply listen to the beauty of the sound.
4. Stretch.  Anyone can stretch right in their chair.  Raise your arms above you and reach for the ceiling.  Lean your head down over your knees and let your arms relax to the floor.
5. Take a moment to meditate or pray. Go to the restroom if you need a moment of privacy.  Meditate on your breath or pray a short prayer.  This is a means to the end of "praying without ceasing."
6. Keep a scripture verse or inspirational saying on a small piece of paper.  Put it in your pocket or tack it on your bulletin board.  Read it as if you are reading it with your heart. Get lost in its meaning for just a moment. Let its peace invade your being.
7. Write or say an affirmation such as, "All my work gets done with ease," or "I finish my tasks with serenity," or "God guides my hands and feet as I do my job."

What are your spiritually mature coping mechanisms for a stressful day?  I’d like to hear from you!

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It was late Friday night at O’Hare airport in Chicago. The plane was a little delayed and all the passengers were tired, crabby and eager to go home, including me. As we entered the aircraft, we were greeted by the first class flight attendant, who had a personality that filled the aircraft! “Welcome aboard, and how are you doing tonight?” he would ask each person as they boarded. I took my seat in first class, delighted that I could observe this flight attendant take command of his aircraft, greet each passenger personally and welcome them onto his flight. When a young mother with a crying toddler came on, he greeted the young girl with, “Honey, it’s your lucky day – you get to fly on my airplane tonight!” As we pulled away from the gate, he continued his banter during the safety briefing announcements, making jokes and wisecracks, and encouraging the other flight attendants to do the same. I was surprised, amused and impressed with this unusual behavior.

I have noticed that since 9/11, flight attendants and other customer-facing employees at this and other major carriers are demoralized, de-motivated and tired. They have faced salary cuts, longer working hours and higher stress, due to the established possibility of terrorism in the skies. They feel stuck in their jobs, victims of a seniority system that makes it impossible to take a new job with another carrier. All of this made the performance of the flight attendant that Friday night unusual and noteworthy.

What was remarkable was how much pride, energy and ownership he put into his job. I come across people from all levels in the org chart who are in similar employment situations to this flight attendant. Because of the economy and the current job shortage, many people today feel stuck and unappreciated in their jobs. In fact, according to Talent Smart, only 15% of all workers, including managers and executives, feel respected and appreciated in their jobs.[1] Rather than complain about a less-than-perfect job situation, it is the responsibility of each worker, from the CEO down to the lowest-paid employee, to take pride in their job and do it to the best of their abilities.

How can you take pride in your job? Here are a few suggestions:

• Decide to give it 110%: What your mother told you is true: if a job is worth doing, it is worth doing right. Do it to the best of your ability. Own your job output and put your good name on it. You don’t have to love your boss, have the perfect co-workers or the best working conditions to take pride in your work and go the extra mile to ensure high quality results. Notice, however, that we are talking 110%, not 200% percent. I meet many over-achieving executives who have exhausted themselves trying to be all things to all people in a difficult environment. Pace yourself, set priorities, identify the areas that you can exert the most influence and delegate or defer the rest.
• Exert control over what you can: You may not have control over all aspects of your job, but you can identify areas that you do control and focus on them. The flight attendant had control over the airplanes he flew, and he focused on how he could influence the atmosphere of that environment. You may not be able to influence the performance targets the Vice President sets, for example, but if you are a manager or director, you do have control over how you communicate them to your workgroup. Concentrate on supporting your group so they can do the best work possible. Then try to let go of the need to control what you cannot.
• Make it fun: We spend too much time at work not to have a little fun at it! The flight attendant customized his safety announcements, using his own talents, to make it fun. Although not everyone is a comedian, we each have a unique approach to humor and having fun. How can you give your co-workers a smile and make their day? How can you lighten up your workplace?
• Speak and act positively toward co-workers: If you change your attitude and behavior, often other people will change, too. Sometimes people get locked into a negative relationship with a co-worker or manager because of personality differences, miscommunications, annoying personal habits or past affronts. If you find your self in this position and the other person is basically an OK person - not a bully and not acting illegally or unethically - try this experiment for two weeks and see if it makes a difference: Speak and act only positively to that person. Compliment the person when it is warranted. Notice the good things they do. Support them in their job. Do not speak disparagingly about that person to anyone, including your spouse or partner. If you are able to do this for just two weeks, it is highly likely that you will notice that the other person responds in kind, and that you have repaired the situation. The result: a happier, less stressed YOU.
• Practice extreme self-care: If you are in a high-stress job, take good care of yourself. Self-care is highly individual and dependent on life stage, financial resources and time constraints. Seek ways to manage your stress and balance your energies in ways that make sense for your situation. Simple self-care can include taking time to walk outside at lunchtime, talking to a good friend and having an active social life. Self-care might also include massages, regular exercise, and, ironically, community service. Community service can broaden your perspective by getting you out of your normal environment and can fulfill the human need to serve others.

If successful in applying some of these guidelines, an amazing thing may happen: You may find that by changing YOUR attitude toward work, the work atmosphere changes. Take a lesson from the flight attendant, and you may find that the job you thought was less than perfect is actually pretty darn good!

[1] Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves, “The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book”

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Change your thoughts and you change your life - we’ve heard this lesson in multiple forms from many teachers.  May Kay Ash told us that "If your mind can conceive it, and if you can believe it, you can achieve it." Dr. Norman Vincent Peale told us about the power of positive thinking.  The Christian Bible tells us that "whatever a man sows, so shall he reap."  We know from personal experience that if we wake up in a bad mood and do nothing to change our negative attitude, the rest of the day will be full of disappointments and snafus.  There is something about our inner thoughts, attitudes and beliefs that have an annoyingly reliable tendency to be reflected in what happens to us.

This week I was struck by the power of this lesson in my own life.  We have a teenager in the family who is only weeks away from going away to college, and his behavior and attitude toward his parents is edgy, to say the least.  We figured it was completely normal, and perhaps even God’s way of making us look forward to him leaving the nest.  My husband and I have been complaining to each other about him - until I happened to be speaking to an adult friend of my son’s who said, "Your son told me he is really going to miss you when he goes to college, and wants to spend some time with you this summer."  I was shocked that my son would think that, much less say that to a trusted friend.  Ever since then, I’ve looked at my son with different eyes.  He looks so handsome, so kind, so smart now! I give him a kiss more often, tell him I love him and will miss him - heck, I even gave him a back massage this week!  The miracle is that my son has been sweet to me ever since I changed my attitude toward him. 

What a whack on the side of the head!  Duh!  Of course, he could pick up on my energy, attitude and impatience with him, and he was acting accordingly.  There was also a lot of normal teenaged hormones and the process of individuation going on at the same time, but as my husband always says, "Who’s the adult in this situation? It’s you, honey, not the kids."  I needed to change my inner thoughts to change the outer life of our family.

Is there someone in your life who is irritating you?  Perhaps it’s a son or daughter, or a co-worker, a customer or a friend.  Could you change your attitude, your inner thoughts about this person? Could you start to think they are handsome, kind or smart, like I did with my son?  Could you see that person with the eyes of God, as a blessed child of the universe? I bet if you can change your inner thoughts, the other person will start behaving differently also.

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The scene: a hip and fashionable downtown restaurant. A high-ranking manager of a technology company and several of his team members are enjoying lunch together to celebrate the team’s recent achievement. As the conversation veers off onto casual topics, one of the employees excitedly explains about a new start-up company for which her cousin was named president, ending with, “Wouldn’t you just love to be in her shoes?” The boss turns to her and says, “You wouldn’t love that - you’d hate it. You wouldn’t be comfortable as an entrepreneur.” The conversation stops briefly as all heads turn to see how the employee would react to the boss’s cutting remark. “Hmmm,” said the employee slowly, “That’s an interesting observation.” The lunchtime chatter quickly turns to another topic.

Take nothing personally – this is easier said than done. The employee in the scenario described above was me, and the conversation took place many, many years ago. I wish I could say that I didn’t take the boss’s remark personally, but honestly, I did for a while. What I realize now is that the boss was speaking from his own perspective, emotions and needs. His opinion of my abilities was colored by his own “stuff”. 

Each of us views life through completely different lenses – it is as if we each wear a different pair of glasses that allow us to focus differently, to block out certain information and to interpret events in a singular way. We take in and process information through our unique lenses, which restricts us to acting solely out of our own perspective. These lenses are colored by our personalities and our talents, which were developed during our formative years. The lenses also reflect our current needs and our previous experiences, especially if they were negative, emotionally-charged events. The brain stores emotional memories so they can be accessed in a nanosecond, causing us to react in a knee-jerk fashion that has little to do with the present situation.

The boss’s words to his employee in the lunchtime conversation were filtered through his lens of needs, personality and emotional experiences. I cannot accurately guess what that lens was, but I know now that it was about him, not about me.

Now that I’m older and wiser, I would choose a different reaction to my boss’ words. Instead of turning his remark inward and taking it personally, I can now see that his remark is coming directly from his lens or perspective of the situation. Here are the steps that I would now take in this situation.

The “Take Nothing Personally” Process:

1. Stop the knee-jerk reaction: As with most processes, the first step is the most difficult but the most important. To stop a knee-jerk reaction requires a high level of self-awareness – in other words, we need to be aware of our reaction in the moment in order to stop it. Fortunately, we can learn to be aware of our reactions by habitually taking a breath before responding to every situation. Adopt a mental image of yourself as calm and serene in the midst of adversity, which will help you to pause when you are being triggered by someone’s remarks or actions.
2. Pause. The best way to keep from taking it personally is to redirect your mental energies from the emotional brain to the logical brain. Count to ten – backwards and in French! – is a great way to divert your mind to its analytical, rather than emotional, functions.
3. Say to yourself, “That’s one person’s opinion.” Remind yourself that the person is speaking or acting from a viewpoint that encompasses their emotional memories, needs and personality. It has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them. Without judgment, you might try to imagine what might cause them act or speak as they did.
4. Take care of yourself. You might affirm yourself by saying, “I know I am a capable, intelligent person.” You might remember a time when you were completely happy or proud of yourself – we call this a “positive anchor”. You might call your partner, best friend or Mom and ask them for a pep talk – and bask in their love.

Taking nothing personally will lighten the emotional and spiritual burden you carry. It will also improve your interpersonal relationships. Imagine the possibilities of a frictionless, productive workplace created by a team that works under the motto of “Take nothing personally!” What a wonderful place that would be.

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An athlete in training knows that periods of intense exercise must be followed by time for rest and recovery. The muscles are strengthened by this process of stress followed by rest, but muscles fail if they are strained for too long. Just like athlete’s muscles, our spirits and minds need periods of rest and recovery. I strongly advocate periodic breaks from the pounding daily routine of work and family responsibilities. The mind can recover by being exposed to new ideas in a different environment, but the spirit needs expansive, quiet time to rest and recover its zest.

Business conferences are good events for stimulating the mind. Going away from the daily work routine and hearing cutting-edge speakers and thinkers can be extraordinarily healing and inspiring to the mind.  The spirit, on the other hand, needs to periodically experience quiet times, enjoy nature and take time for contemplation in order to rejuvenate.

I am experiencing both types of events in the course of two weeks this summer. I just returned from a fast-paced business conference that was at once highly stimulating and physically tiring. During the time out of the office, I was able to think new thoughts, see my business from different perspectives and consider new possibilities. I came away inspired and charged up, ready to apply some of the newly discovered insights and tips. Next, I turn to a quiet retreat time to restore my spirit. I will spend four days on retreat at Upaya Zen Center in New Mexico.  During this time, I will meditate, journal, eat several meals in silence, enjoy the spirit-nourishing group activities and bathe my eyes and soul in beautiful mountain scenery.

It is so important that we give ourselves the gift of rejuvenation. We need daily, weekly, annual and once-in-a-lifetime rituals that feed our souls and spirits.

What are your plans for rejuvenating your mind and spirit?

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We do not often think of forgiveness as having anything to do with the workplace, but surprisingly, forgiveness is an essential practice of a highly effective work team. Thanks to recent psychological and medical research, we know that the act of forgiveness has many benefits to the individual. “People who are taught to forgive become less angry, more hopeful, less depressed, less anxious, less stressed, more confident, and they learn to like themselves more.”¹ What manager would NOT want people who are less angry, more hopeful, less depressed, etc. on their team? For a team, the benefits of forgiveness can be multiplied by the number of people who work together. An atmosphere of forgiveness will improve the teamwork, productivity, spiritual integrity and creativity of a workgroup. When practiced by a whole division or company, forgiveness can mean increased profitability.

What do we mean by forgiveness?  Forgiveness is a process that we choose to take after we are wronged or hurt by another person. It does not happen automatically. Forgiveness takes a conscious effort - often, the amount of work needed to forgive is proportional to our perception of the gravity of the hurt. Forgiveness is a way to let go of the past so it doesn’t imprison you. We already know it is good for your health and good for your peace of mind. Lastly, forgiveness is a spiritual practice that we can use in the workplace. For step-by-step instructions on a personal forgiveness process, please visit a previous post called Seven Steps to Forgiveness.

To create an environment of forgiveness, a leader must start by establishing and communicating a purpose that is greater than just increased revenues or reduced costs. A compelling purpose for a team might highlight benefits to the customer and reference some of the higher values of customers and employees. For example, Mary Kay Corporation’s mission/purpose statement is "to enrich the lives of women". The leader of a team that practices forgiveness will be quick to spot conflict among members, and will coach the disputing parties to 1) air their grievances in a calm manner 2) look for the unmet needs of both parties and 3) look for mutually beneficial resolutions to the grievance - before the grievance has a chance to fester and gather emotional energy. A good leader will model forgiveness by personally following those steps toward resolution of a grievance.  A good leader will create an atmosphere in which both personal and team failures are seen as learning opportunities rather than causes for recrimination.

What happens when a team does not practice forgiveness? Unresolved grudges build up resentment to levels much higher than the seriousness of the original grievance. People stop talking to each other. Opposing camps are formed, and often if one person is seen talking to a person of the "other camp" they are labeled traitors. A colleague recently described such an atmosphere at her workplace. "It’s gotten to the point that I don’t want to go to work anymore," she lamented. "I try to be nice to everyone, but sometimes I’ll try to talk to a person from the other camp, and he completely ignores me.  He might refuse to perform job duties that are clearly expected of him just because he is working next to me." An unforgiving workplace is toxic, stressful, ineffective and non-productive. Absenteeism, health care costs and attrition all rise in an unforgiving environment - at great expense to the employer.

As leaders, it is our spiritual imperative to build forgiving organizations. A spiritually intelligent team is a team that learns to forgive. How can you contribute to the forgiveness quotient of your workplace?

¹ Dr. Fred Luskin, Forgive for Good: A Proven Prescription for Health and Happiness, page 78.

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If you had to answer honestly, could you truly say that  you are present in the moment most of the time?  I think that most of us (I include myself, but I’m working on it!) are neither mindful nor fully present  for the majority of our waking moments.  Mindfulness is an important part of many spiritual practices, most notably Buddhism.  And for good reason - mindfulness keeps us from worrying about the future or fretting about the past.  By definition, the present moment is the point at which we live, so why not be fully aware and engaged in it! It is in the present moment that we are most alive and in connection with the Ground of our Being.

Being fully present in the moment is a decision that we can make any day.  It is perhaps best to start being present during less stressful times, so we can develop our mindfulness muscle, so to speak.  Then, that muscle will be strong enough to carry us through the rougher times.  I suggest that you practice mindfulness at home and on the way to work to get used to being in the moment.  Of course, you can and should practice mindfulness at any time - I’m just saying it’s easier to start when you are doing something with less emotional charge than a tense situation at work.

Being mindful is simple and yet difficult.  It is focusing your mind on exactly what you are doing in that moment.  The Buddhists say, "Chop wood, carry water." So when you chop wood (or brush your teeth, drive a car, load the dishwasher, etc.) you do only that - you don’t also mentally plan for tomorrow’s presentation at the board meeting.  What we are trying to do is train our brain to focus and be aware of what you are doing in the moment, which increases your calmness, equanimity and focus.

Independence Day in the US was two days ago, and I prepared a rather large feast for my family and some friends who came to dinner for the holiday.  I heartily enjoy entertaining but have less fondness for cooking, so I confine my culinary endeavors to major holidays and parties that we throw. This time, I made the decision early in the morning that July 4th would be a mindfulness day for me.  As I chopped vegetables, I was fully present to the rhythmic sound of my knife cutting the carrots, to the sight of the onion slices lined up like soldiers on my cutting board, to the smell of the vegetables releasing their aroma as I cut them.  And then, I noticed my hands, scooping up the sliced vegetables and putting them in the bowl.  Suddenly fascinated with how hands work, I admired and appreciated them as they did their amazing job, prehensile thumb and all. My mind would wander to worrying about this or that, then I would notice and gently bring my awareness back to what I was doing.  I found that by the end of the day, I was feeling happy and fulfilled, not tired and resentful as I usually feel after spending the day in the kitchen.

I think that you, too, will discover the benefits of mindfulness.  You will be less tired, happier and more energetic for the next moment that comes. So, how can you build mindfulness moments into your day? 

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